Fart profiles

The profiles of different people who fart, as written by a kid.. Pics are abit small, so it might help if you click on it and read ;)

fail

Pictures of failure here for today.. Some are taken from fail blog, some from random internet people



Who knows, this might just be possible in the future..

This is why i quit taekwando some time back! I only went for like 3 lessons before i quit.

I only have one question in mind.. WHY is he in pink undies????

Hey, I dunno why they failed him??? He already drank like 3 quaters of the milk from his ear

And their balcony is underground

I remember i had a picture of a spectator doing the same thing! I'll post it up if i find it

Greatest prank idea

Crapbook

If you have one question that you can ask God, what would you ask?

Well, here's what some kids would ask.. Hilarious stuff! As for me, I don't even know what I wanna ask, perhaps I'll write it up when i think of one..

Funny clips from little britain

Funny as approved by me, not everyone appreciate this sort of humor though. Little britain is a comedy sketch show which airs on BBC. The following are just short little clips of the funnier moments. They've got different characthers and are usually categorized that way

Carol - Guy who dress up as lady, usual scene is to show him/her on different job positions, doing things that irritates!



Andy and lou, the one in wheel chair is andy and the hairy guy is lou, the big hairy guy is also the same dude playing carol.





Sebastian and the prime minister - It's a little gayish comedy going on here, but still pretty darn funny!












Look up youtube for little britain for more of their videos

Funny comics for the day

I'm a little down today, so i went through my archives to dig these comics out! I'm not really into comics but these short ones are brilliant



Evolution of life

Human crossing

Ikea job interview

Japanese martial art

Proud to be nigerian scammed

Complain boxes that you can never reach

Quotes from the army

These are real quotes!


- "Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher


- "Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground." - USAF


- "When the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal


- "It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." - U.S. Air Force Manual

- "Tracers work both ways." - U.S. Army Ordnance


- "Bravery is being the only one who knows you`re afraid."


- "If you see a bomb technician running, follow him." - USAF


- "Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death ... I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing." - At the entrance to the old SR-71 operating base Kadena,Japan


- "You`ve never been lost until you`ve been lost at Mach 3." - Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot)


- "The only time you have too much fuel is when you`re on fire."


- "Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky." --From an old carrier sailor


- "If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it`s probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."


- "When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash."

I LOVE icanhascheezburger.com!

Have been regularly visiting their site for a few years, brilliant stuff there! They post pictures of cats with their perceived actions or words in the captions. It takes awhile to get used to their speech though. Here's the link to I can has cheez burger This post has 12 of the best I've collected, you can also call it my favourites

Sometimes they have other animals too

A Comic about the 2008 olympics

Kinda funny, but we know it's true ;)

Top 10 funny breathsprays

Top 10 funny breath sprays, as determined by me. I suspect these breath sprays are manufactured by the same company, hehehe but they're so funny anyway!



10. You Da Man!

9. LiAR

8. Know It All

7. Mother Teresa

6. Ass Kisser

5. Stay in Love Forever

4. Understand Modern Art instantly

3. Wash Away Your Sins (my friend has this!)

2. Understand Your Mother instantly

1. And the last one that crackles me up. Believe in God instantly

Best ad ever!

It's a beer ad from an australian beer company, Carlton Draught

Japanese olympics?

It's the japanese again.. Not exactly funny but it's interesting



The Japanese Olympics - Watch more free videos

Funny objects with faces

Came across these pics quite some time back but i didnt manage to save them. Recently, I spotted them again and they mange to make me laugh again, especially the last two. I can't remember if I have come across any object like these in real life, but i'll snap it down next time! Im sure there's more out there, I'll post it up if i come across any ;)

Weird looking cranky face

I have no idea what object this is

but it reminds me of monkeys

looks to me like it's having a running nose

Delighted to be seated on!

Puke metal

This looks like an angry cookie!

And a smiling grandpa!

Silly person and funny cups

here's the story:

For the last company picnic, the management decided that, due to financial issues, we could have alcohol, but only one cup of drink per person. I was fired for ordering the cups.

Leg test joke

A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his zoology test the next day. As he entered the classroom, he saw ten stands with ten legs on them. Each bird had a sack over its head; only the legs were showing.

He sat straight in the front row because he wanted to do the best job possible. The professor announced that the test would be to look at each of the birds' legs and give the common name, habitat, genus and species. The student looked at each of the birds' legs. They all looked the same to him. He began to get upset. He had stayed up all night studying and now had to identify birds by their legs. The more he thought about it the madder he got. Finally he could stand it no longer.

He went up to the professor's desk and said, "What a stupid test! How could anyone tell the difference between birds by looking at their legs?" With that the student threw his test on the professor's desk and walked to the door. The professor was surprised. The class was so big that he didn't know every student's name so as the student reached the door the professor called, "Mister, what's your name?" The enraged student pulled up his pants to show his legs and said, "You tell me buddy! You tell me!"

Funny pranks

I've been burying myself to watch pranks on youtube recently, especially japanese ones. Here are some good ones to share ;)

Chasing prank


Floating toilet prank


Wake up call


Elevator disco prank

Funniest answers from examinations

GCSE Exams

The following questions and answers were collected from GCSE exams, and are
some of the answers given by British students writing their secondary four
GCSE Exams last year. These are genuine responses!!

Geography

Q. Name the four seasons?
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q Explain the processes by which water can be made safe to drink?
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants
like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q. How is dew formed?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q. What is a planet?
A. A body of earth surrounded by sky

Q. What causes the tides in the ocean?
A. The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to
flow towards the Moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature
abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Sociology

What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.

In a democratic society, how important are elections?
Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

What are steroids?
Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Biology

What happens to your body when you age?
When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Name a major disease associated with cigarettes?
Premature death.

What is artificial insemination?
When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.


How can you delay milk turning sour?
Keep it in the cow (He got an A)

How are the main parts of the body categorised? (e.g. abdomen)
The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax, the
abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the
heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowls, A,E,I,O
and U.

What is the Fibula?
A small lie

What does "varicose" mean?
Nearby

What is the most common form of birth control?
Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"?
The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

What is a seizure?
A Roman emperor

What is a terminal illness?
When you are sick at the airport

Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.

English

Use the word "judicious" in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.
(This refers to an advert for Fairy Liquid washing up soap - the strap line goes
'hands that do dishes can be soft as your face')

What does the word "benign" mean?
Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head.



Gotta love the last one..

King of mimics!

AMAZING BIRD.. Omg, it's 5am now over here, i wouldn't be posting if i didn't laughed my ass out over this. It's a dubbed video, still extremely funny though

Funny olympic pictures

Funny and interesting pictures from the beijing 2008 olympics, I added my own captions to interprete the pictures ;)

It is said that if you fart for long enough,

you can actually levitate meters above ground

who wants GIANT CANDY?? (look at their expressions!)

I wonder how will the 2012 olympic shades look like

It's called accidental discharge of firearm

Psst.. In the olympics, every little aid counts. Using your skin for that little extra power is a secret technique in the archery world.

Say cheese dude, it's the invisible camera.
Proudly made in the USA

You know it when there's some hatred going on

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